NINE THINGS TO KNOW ABOUT GOING THROUGH A NEW JERSEY DIVORCE

By Peter Van Aulen, Esq.

1. If you are served with a summons and complaint for divorce you are given 35 days to answer the same. Do not allow said 35 days to lapse without filing a responsive pleading. If said 35 days lapses you will be in default and your spouse might get everything they want at your expense.
2. Do not represent yourself. It is true that I am a divorce attorney who makes his living representing clients going through divorce. Obviously, my advice is self serving. However, divorce is one of the greatest emotional and financial decisions a person can make. The outcome of your divorce could affect you and your children for many years. The divorce process can get complicated. This is why you need competent representation.
3. You should not hire an attorney who is a jack-of-all-trades. You should hire an attorney who practices primarily in Family Law. The more experience an attorney has in Family Law the better representation you will receive.
4. If you are going through a divorce or thinking about filing for a divorce, consult with an attorney before you make any major financial decisions such as purchasing real estate, transferring assets, or managing inherited and premarital property.
5. After a divorce complaint is filed the court requires both parties to file a Case Information Statement. This is a nine page document in which you state your income, monthly expenses, assets and liabilities. This is one of the most important documents you will file in your divorce. A judge uses said document to determine the division of assets and to determine temporary and final support issues. Divorce attorneys and mediators also use said document in settlement negotiations. Therefore, it is imperative that said document is filled out correctly.
6. If you have hired an attorney, do not make an offer to settle your case directly with your spouse without first discussing it with your attorney. You hire an attorney not only to represent you in court, but to give you legal advice.
7. When in the court room show respect to the judge, court personnel and other counsel. I know this sounds remedial; however, the judge is constantly observing the parties. Therefore, it is important to make a good impression.
8. Do not ignore a Judge’s Order. If you are unhappy with the decision file a motion for reconsideration or/and appeal.
9. Do not tell your children the details of your divorce litigation or use them in any way to get to your spouse. Do not alienate your children’s affections towards your spouse. Children need to be protected.