Dealing with a Divorce in NJ: 3 Tips for Staying Sane

Going through a divorce in NJ can be difficult. Whether this is your first time dealing with divorce or you've been down this road before, chances are that you're feeling a lot of different things. You might feel angry, sad, or frustrated. You might feel anxious. Sometimes, you might even feel relieved. No matter what led to your divorce, it's important to remember that you need to focus on yourself during this time. One of the most valuable things you can do is to ensure you're taking the necessary steps to stay calm and in control during this time. Here's what you need to know.

Don't Trash Talk in Front of Your Kids

You might be tempted to trash talk your ex. While there's nothing wrong with venting to your close friends, it's important that you avoid disparaging your ex-spouse's name during this time. If you have children, trash talking becomes even more of a no-no. Remember that regardless of your feelings toward your ex, they are your child's parent. Never put your child in the middle of your divorce. Instead of taking your side, this may make your child feel resentful and can lead to increased stress levels for everyone involved. If you need to talk about your former partner, get a couple of your friends and talk with them when your child isn't around.

Focus on Your Future: Not the Past

One of the most important things you can do is to start focusing on your future. While you might be tempted to think about past memories and different aspects of your relationship, try to think about your future instead. The more you think about past betrayals, fights, and pain, the more difficult your divorce in NJ will be. Focusing on the past tends to make people feel stressed and anxious. When your thoughts start drifting toward past arguments and problems, try to instead focus on the things you're going to do now that you're separated. Are you going to take a trip? Buy a new house? Start a new job? The possibilities are endless, so try to think about your beautiful future instead of your frustrating past.

Talk to a Professional

Don't be afraid to seek professional counseling if you can't manage your stress levels on your own. Many adults don't consider talking to someone because they feel awkward, uncomfortable, or embarrassed. The truth is that your therapist isn't interested in judging you. They're interested in helping provide you with the skills you need to move forward with your life. If you're having trouble sleeping, feeling depressed, or have incredible anxiety, schedule an appointment with a therapist you can offer you valuable information on coping with your life and moving forward.

Remember that no matter what you're going through, you are not alone. Many adults deal with divorce each year and go on to lead productive, healthy lives. Whether or not separating from your partner was your choice, you're in control of how you choose to move forward. Why not make your future a bright one?

If you have any questions concerning a divorce in NJ call the Law Offices of Peter Van Aulen for a free consultation at (201) 845-7400.

Client Reviews
★★★★★
Peter has integrity, and values his relationships with his clients beyond his financial relationship with them. For me to say this about any lawyer is really saying something. He is compassionate, straightforward and knowledgeable. I would easily recommend him to anybody.
★★★★★
Peter Van Aulen handled my case with great diligence and integrity. He is also a compassionate individual who realizes what a difficult time divorce can be emotionally. Peter works hard and doesn't take any shortcuts in preparing for a case… I highly recommend Mr. Van Aulen and his staff. Chuck Solomon
★★★★★
Peter is an exceptionally great attorney. He handled my child custody case and was able to ease any of my concerns with honest answers. He always took the time to explain the pros/cons and was always available to answer any questions that I had… I would highly recommend this attorney to anyone who is looking for one. Jessica Cruz
★★★★★
Peter Van Aulen is a very compassionate, honest and straightforward person. He was there for me at my lowest point with a genuine concern not only for my situation, but for me and my child's well being above all… He is fair and he is strong and when push comes to shove he is there for you. Cathy Dodge
★★★★★
Our cousin used Peter's law office to help with a sticky custody situation. He was extremely responsive, very nice and most importantly did an awesome job with the court! He is awesome. Lawrence Polsky

*Results may vary depending on your particular facts and legal circumstances