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Five Common Divorce Emotions

A variety of emotions can arise during the course of a New Jersey marriage dissolution case. In fact, there are give divorce emotions that occur with considerable frequency. The divorce emotions are:

  • Anger
  • Happiness
  • Fear
  • Depression
  • Denial

One of the realities of a divorce case is that you are apt to experience all of these emotions (and even others) at some point during your marriage dissolution case. Moreover, it is also possible that you will experience multiple emotions at generally the same time. For example, on any given day during your divorce case you may experience fear, anger, and denial – or some other combination of emotions.


One of the most broadly occurring divorce emotions is anger. Anger oftentimes presents itself before, during, and after marriage dissolution proceedings for a number of different reasons. These include anger with the other spouse, anger associated with the collapse of the marriage itself, and even anger directed at yourself for a variety of different reasons. If anger is not tamped down, it can impact your ability to make sober decisions in regard to your divorce case.


Some people experience a sense of relief and even happiness when a divorce case is initiated. There are instances in which a happy feeling associated with a divorce can be fleeting. There are other instances in which that sense of happiness can be quite pervasive and enduring. In the grand scheme of things, there are marriages which truly have reached a juncture at which their end is broadly beneficial to all involved.


Of the various divorce emotions, there is one that people involved in a marriage dissolution case like to downplay or even try to overlook. That emotion is fear.

The reality is that many men and women alike have a belief that admitting they are experiencing fear is a sign of weakness. The bottom line is that recognizing that you experience fear because of the end of your marriage and associated divorce proceedings is not a sign of weakness. Rather, it is a perfectly normal emotion that nearly all people involved in divorce proceedings will experience at one time or another.


Perhaps the most pervasive type of emotion experienced during a marriage dissolution case is depression. A marriage is one of the most significant personal relationships a person will have during the course of a lifetime. And when that primary relationship falls apart and comes to an end, it is perfectly understandable for one of both spouses to experience depression.

Significant or chronic depression arising because of the end of a marriage can impact all areas of a person’s life. This includes impairing that individual’s ability to make suitable decisions during the course of the marriage dissolution proceedings themselves.

If depression becomes significant or interferes with day to day living (or the ability to make decisions in a divorce case), a person so afflicted is wise to seek professional support and assistance. There are therapists and counselors who focus their professional efforts on working with people experiencing challenges – including depression – as a result of divorcing.


Denial is yet another emotion people experience during the course of their divorces. A commonplace example of divorce denial is a spouse holding a belief that the other party to a marriage dissolution really doesn’t want to end the marriage. This type of denial can be exhibited by a spouse believing that the other party will change his or her mind at any time and “call off” the divorce. In most instances, this type of denial, the belief that the other spouse will call off the marriage dissolution case, simply is not grounded in reality.

Understand Your Rights: Visit with a New Jersey Divorce Attorney Today

You can obtain information about your legal rights in a marriage dissolution case by contacting the Law Offices of Peter Van Aulen at (201) 845-7400. We can schedule a free initial consultation with you at a time convenient for you. Not only can we provide you with an overview of the New Jersey divorce process but will answer any questions you may have regarding your situation.

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Peter Van Aulen handled my case with great diligence and integrity. He is also a compassionate individual who realizes what a difficult time divorce can be emotionally. Peter works hard and doesn't take any shortcuts in preparing for a case… I highly recommend Mr. Van Aulen and his staff. Chuck Solomon
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