MEETING OPTIONS DURING THE CORONAVIRUS: The Law Offices of Peter Van Aulen understands your concerns regarding the spread of the Coronavirus, and now offers different meeting options to our clients and those seeking legal representation. All meetings, including initial consultations, can be handled either through the phone, FaceTime, Zoom, or in person.

Keep New Jersey Parenting Time Child Transfers Civil

Even in more friendly New Jersey divorce and post-divorce settings, one point in time when conflict can arise between divorcing or divorced parents is when a parenting time child transfer occurs, when a child is going from one parent to another for what used to be called visitation. Time and again when it comes to New Jersey parenting time and custody conflicts, problems can arise at the time of a child transfer from the custodial to noncustodial parent to and from parenting time.

In this article we present some strategies to consider employing as a means to reduce conflict during child transfers from one parent to another for scheduled parenting time. These strategies that will be discussed in greater detail include:

  • Arrive on time for parenting time child transfer
  • Make the transfer time period as brief as possible
  • Greet the other parent with a hello and goodbye
  • Parenting time child transfer is not the time for a discussion
  • Take all reasonable steps to avoid an argument
  • Do not respond to negative comments from the other parent
Arrive on Time for Parenting Time Child Transfer

A primary step you can take when it comes to a New Jersey parenting time child transfer is to arrive at the predesignated exchange point on time or even a bit early. Arriving late to a parenting time child transfer has the potential for setting the stage for an argument or some other unpleasant exchange in front of your child or children. When a parent is late to arrive, it really does often render a transfer a less than civil process.

Make the Transfer Time Period as Brief as Possible

There is absolutely no reason for a parenting time child transfer to take much time at all. The process typically can take a matter of a couple of minutes. Nothing needs to be done at a parenting time transfer beyond the child or children going from one parent to another with the belongings being taken to or from a period of parenting time.

Greet the Other Parent with a Hello and Goodbye

Civility really can go a significant way when it comes to keeping a parenting time related exchange as calm and eventless as possible. Even if you are fairly certain the other parent will not respond, politely greet that person with a hello at the beginning of the transfer and goodbye at the end. As will be discussed in more detail in a moment, there really is no need for much else in the way of conversation during a parenting time exchange.

Parenting Time Child Transfer is Not the Time for a Discussion

The child exchange associated with parenting time is not the moment for discussion of any significance between the parents. If some sort of information needs to be conveyed from one parent to the other that is relevant to parenting time, that communication can be had between the parents before or after the parenting time transfer.

Take All Reasonable Steps to Avoid an Argument

Some parents do maintain a decent relationship during and after a divorce case. Some do not. Because of this, it may be easier for some parents to avoid an argument at the time of a parenting time child exchange. For others, it may be more of a challenge. The bottom line is that you should take all reasonable steps to avoid an argument during the exchange, a dispute that is highly likely to be seen and heard by your child or children.

Do Not Respond to Negative Comments from the Other Parent

If the other parent makes negative comments to you during the exchange, that truly is unfortunate. However, you do not want to make matters worse in front of your child or children by responding to any such negative comments coming at you from the other parent. This type of conduct by the other parent would be inconsistent with an existing New Jersey parenting time order in a divorce case.

In the final analysis, when it comes to New Jersey parenting time, the best interests of a child or children are always the primary concern. Those best interests are served when parents do not get into some sort of argument or dispute during a parenting time exchange. If you have a parenting time or custody issue, call us today at (201) 845-7400 for a free consultation.

Client Reviews
Peter has integrity, and values his relationships with his clients beyond his financial relationship with them. For me to say this about any lawyer is really saying something. He is compassionate, straightforward and knowledgeable. I would easily recommend him to anybody. Lewie W.
Peter Van Aulen handled my case with great diligence and integrity. He is also a compassionate individual who realizes what a difficult time divorce can be emotionally. Peter works hard and doesn't take any shortcuts in preparing for a case… I highly recommend Mr. Van Aulen and his staff. Chuck Solomon
Peter is an exceptionally great attorney. He handled my child custody case and was able to ease any of my concerns with honest answers. He always took the time to explain the pros/cons and was always available to answer any questions that I had… I would highly recommend this attorney to anyone who is looking for one. Jessica Cruz
Peter Van Aulen is a very compassionate, honest and straightforward person. He was there for me at my lowest point with a genuine concern not only for my situation, but for me and my child's well being above all… He is fair and he is strong and when push comes to shove he is there for you. Cathy Dodge
Our cousin used Peter's law office to help with a sticky custody situation. He was extremely responsive, very nice and most importantly did an awesome job with the court! He is awesome. Lawrence Polsky

*Results may vary depending on your particular facts and legal circumstances