New Jersey Marriage Dissolution: Why It’s Nearly Impossible to Change a Narcissistic Spouse

Time and again, a New Jersey marriage dissolution proceeding is initiated because one or another spouse can fairly be classified as a narcissist. The grim reality is that more often than not, it is nearly impossible to change a narcissistic spouse – meaning that a New Jersey marriage dissolution proceeding may prove to be unavoidable. There are a number of facts and factors to bear in mind when it comes to narcissism and the prospect of a New Jersey divorce.

Lack of Self-Awareness

Narcissists often lack self-awareness, making it difficult for them to acknowledge their own behaviors and the impact they have on others. This lack of self-awareness often prevents them from realizing the need for change, thereby making the process of transforming their behavior exceptionally challenging.

Denial of Fault

Narcissists tend to deny any fault in their actions, consistently blaming others for issues that arise. This denial creates a significant barrier to recognizing and accepting the need for personal change.

Fear of Vulnerability

Many narcissists possess a deeply ingrained fear of appearing vulnerable. This fear can hinder their willingness to change, as acknowledging the need for change often requires admitting personal flaws or shortcomings.

Resistance to Criticism

Narcissists often react poorly to criticism, viewing it as a personal attack rather than constructive feedback. This resistance makes it difficult to address issues in the relationship, as any attempt to discuss problematic behavior can lead to defensiveness or hostility.

Need for Control

Narcissists have a need for control, often viewing any changes as a potential loss of this control. This perception can make them resistant to making changes, even when those changes could have a positive impact on their relationships and overall life.

Lack of Empathy

Narcissists often lack empathy, making it difficult for them to understand how their actions affect their spouse. This lack of understanding and compassion can reduce their motivation to change their behavior, as they may not fully grasp the negative impact of their actions.

Entitlement

Narcissists often have a sense of entitlement, believing they are inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment. This belief can lead them to conclude that they don’t need to change their behavior, as they may view their actions as justified by their perceived superiority. This certainly can prove to be a situation that does lead to a New Jersey marriage dissolution proceeding.

Manipulative Behaviors

Narcissists can be highly manipulative, making it challenging to address concerns in a straightforward manner. This manipulation can create an environment of confusion and mistrust, complicating efforts to discuss the need for change.

Difficulty in Seeking Help

Many narcissists are hesitant to seek professional help for their behaviors. This reluctance can stem from a fear of being judged or a belief that they don’t need help, making the process of initiating change even more difficult.

Inability to Accept Responsibility

Narcissists often struggle to accept responsibility for their actions, particularly when those actions have caused harm to others. This inability to accept responsibility can make it difficult for them to understand the need for change and to take the necessary steps to alter their behavior.

Superiority Complex

Narcissists often believe that they are superior to others, which can lead them to dismiss the perspectives and feelings of those around them. This superiority complex can inhibit their ability to recognize the negative impact of their actions and the necessity for change.

Inflexible Thinking

Narcissists are often characterized by inflexible thinking, which can make it difficult for them to consider alternative viewpoints or approaches. This inflexibility can limit their ability to recognize the need for change and to adapt their behavior accordingly.

Deflection of Blame

Narcissists frequently deflect blame onto others, avoiding personal accountability. This habit can further hinder their ability to recognize their own shortcomings and the need for personal change.

Insensitivity to Others’ Feelings

Narcissists often display a lack of sensitivity to the feelings of others, which can prevent them from fully understanding the damage caused by their actions. This lack of sensitivity can reduce their motivation to change.

Overemphasis on Image

Narcissists tend to place a significant emphasis on maintaining a certain image or persona, which can lead them to resist changes that they perceive as threatening to this image.

Dismissive Attitude

Narcissists can exhibit a dismissive attitude towards the feelings and needs of their spouse, making it difficult for them to understand the necessity of changing their behavior for the sake of the relationship.

Unrealistic Expectations

Narcissists often have unrealistic expectations of those around them, which can create a barrier to change as they may not recognize their own behavior as problematic.

Obsession with Power and Success

Finally, when it comes to Narcissists and the prospect of a New Jersey marriage dissolution case, Narcissists oftentimes have an obsession with power and success, which can limit their willingness to change behaviors that they believe contribute to their status or success. If you are facing a divorce, call (201) 845-7400 for a free consultation.