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Rebuilding Your Post-Divorce Self

In nearly all cases, a divorce significantly alters the course of a once-married person’s life. Indeed, the life changes associated with a marriage dissolution can prove to be utterly profound. Once marriage dissolution proceedings have drawn to an end, you are likely to find yourself faced with the prospect of rebuilding your life or at least some elements of your life.

The idea of rebuilding your post-divorce self can seem daunting, even potentially overwhelming. There are tactics you should consider employing as part of your overall process to restructure or rebuild your life (and yourself, at least to some degree) once your marriage officially has ended. These include:

  • Undertake a health grieving process
  • Seek professional mental or emotional health assistance
  • Communicate with others you trust
  • Seek legal assistance if and when the need arises
Undertake a Healthy Grieving Process

Even if you feel that ending your marriage is a positive step, you are still experiencing a loss. Your life is changing in a significant way. As a result of the loss associated with a divorce and as part of the process of rebuilding your life following the end of your marriage, you need to undertake a healthy grief process.

The often-used five stages of grief can provide you some guidance on what to expect during the post-divorce grieving process:

  • Denial
  • Anger
  • Bargaining
  • Depression
  • Acceptance

There are a several points to bear in mind regarding these five stages of grief:

  • First, everyone grieves in their own way. Your post-divorce grief process will be unique to you.
  • Second, the five stages of grief mentioned a moment ago do not necessarily occur in the order presented.
  • Third, you may experience more than one of the stages of grief at the same time.
  • Finally, you experience one or more of the different grief stages set forth a moment ago more than one time.
Seek Professional Assistance

Another step you may want to consider taking as part of your effort to rebuild your post-divorce self is to seek professional mental or emotional health assistance. In this day and age there are counselors and therapists that specialize in working with individuals in the midst or divorce but also people who are working at making sense of their post-divorce lives.

There are a number of options to consider when it comes to mental or emotional health support and assistance as you embark on your “new life” following the end of your marriage:

  • Individual counseling or therapy
  • Group therapy
  • Combination of individual and group therapy

There is no shame to be had for reaching out to obtain this type of support during your divorce or in your post-divorce life. Many people take advantage of professional support and assistance of this nature each and every day.

Communicate with Others You Trust

Healthy communication in the post-divorce world is not confined to a therapeutic setting. Another key tactic to employ when it comes to rebuilding your post-divorce self is to communicate regularly with people in your life you trust. This can be family members or friends.

Odds are very strong that you have trustworthy people in your life that have been through divorces themselves. They have faced the challenge of rebuilding or reorienting their lives when their marriages ended. These individuals can be important parts of your support system when you are venturing down the path or rebuilding yourself and your life after you’ve experienced the end of your marriage.

Legal Assistance from a Qualified, Experienced New Jersey Post-Divorce Lawyer

There may be a point in time at which you face legal issues following your divorce. Oftentimes these issues involve matters surrounding children. With that said, there can be a wide array of other types of post-divorce issues that can arise.

You are well-served seeking legal assistance from a qualified, experienced New Jersey post-divorce lawyer. You can arrange a free initial consultation with a skilled, committed New Jersey post-divorce lawyer at the Law Offices of Peter Van Aulen. You can schedule an appointment with a New Jersey post-divorce lawyer by calling our firm at (201) 845-7400.

Client Reviews
Peter has integrity, and values his relationships with his clients beyond his financial relationship with them. For me to say this about any lawyer is really saying something. He is compassionate, straightforward and knowledgeable. I would easily recommend him to anybody. Lewie W.
Peter Van Aulen handled my case with great diligence and integrity. He is also a compassionate individual who realizes what a difficult time divorce can be emotionally. Peter works hard and doesn't take any shortcuts in preparing for a case… I highly recommend Mr. Van Aulen and his staff. Chuck Solomon
Peter is an exceptionally great attorney. He handled my child custody case and was able to ease any of my concerns with honest answers. He always took the time to explain the pros/cons and was always available to answer any questions that I had… I would highly recommend this attorney to anyone who is looking for one. Jessica Cruz
Peter Van Aulen is a very compassionate, honest and straightforward person. He was there for me at my lowest point with a genuine concern not only for my situation, but for me and my child's well being above all… He is fair and he is strong and when push comes to shove he is there for you. Cathy Dodge
Our cousin used Peter's law office to help with a sticky custody situation. He was extremely responsive, very nice and most importantly did an awesome job with the court! He is awesome. Lawrence Polsky

*Results may vary depending on your particular facts and legal circumstances