Rebuilding Your Post-Divorce Self

In nearly all cases, a divorce significantly alters the course of a once-married person’s life. Indeed, the life changes associated with a marriage dissolution can prove to be utterly profound. Once marriage dissolution proceedings have drawn to an end, you are likely to find yourself faced with the prospect of rebuilding your life or at least some elements of your life.

The idea of rebuilding your post-divorce self can seem daunting, even potentially overwhelming. There are tactics you should consider employing as part of your overall process to restructure or rebuild your life (and yourself, at least to some degree) once your marriage officially has ended. These include:

• Undertake a health grieving process
• Seek professional mental or emotional health assistance
• Communicate with others you trust
• Seek legal assistance if and when the need arises

Even if you feel that ending your marriage is a positive step, you are still experiencing a loss. Your life is changing in a significant way. As a result of the loss associated with a divorce and as part of the process of rebuilding your life following the end of your marriage, you need to undertake a healthy grief process.

The often-used five stages of grief can provide you some guidance on what to expect during the post-divorce grieving process:

• Denial
• Anger
• Bargaining
• Depression
• Acceptance

There are a several points to bear in mind regarding these five stages of grief:

• First, everyone grieves in their own way. Your post-divorce grief process will be unique to you.
• Second, the five stages of grief mentioned a moment ago do not necessarily occur in the order presented.
• Third, you may experience more than one of the stages of grief at the same time.
• Finally, you experience one or more of the different grief stages set forth a moment ago more than one time.

Another step you may want to consider taking as part of your effort to rebuild your post-divorce self is to seek professional mental or emotional health assistance. In this day and age there are counselors and therapists that specialize in working with individuals in the midst or divorce but also people who are working at making sense of their post-divorce lives.

There are a number of options to consider when it comes to mental or emotional health support and assistance as you embark on your “new life” following the end of your marriage:

• Individual counseling or therapy
• Group therapy
• Combination of individual and group therapy

There is no shame to be had for reaching out to obtain this type of support during your divorce or in your post-divorce life. Many people take advantage of professional support and assistance of this nature each and every day.

Healthy communication in the post-divorce world is not confined to a therapeutic setting. Another key tactic to employ when it comes to rebuilding your post-divorce self is to communicate regularly with people in your life you trust. This can be family members or friends.

Odds are very strong that you have trustworthy people in your life that have been through divorces themselves. They have faced the challenge of rebuilding or reorienting their lives when their marriages ended. These individuals can be important parts of your support system when you are venturing down the path or rebuilding yourself and your life after you’ve experienced the end of your marriage.

There may be a point in time at which you face legal issues following your divorce. Oftentimes these issues involve matters surrounding children. With that said, there can be a wide array of other types of post-divorce issues that can arise.

You are well-served seeking legal assistance from a qualified, experienced New Jersey post-divorce lawyer. You can arrange a free initial consultation with a skilled, committed New Jersey post-divorce lawyer at the Law Offices of Peter Van Aulen. You can schedule an appointment with a New Jersey post-divorce lawyer by calling our firm at (201) 845-7400.