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What to Know Before a Divorce

Every couple wants to believe their marriage will last forever. On your wedding day, you probably never even considered the possibility that you might one day get divorced. Unfortunately, even marriages that start out well can sometimes fail. Is divorce in NJ the right choice for you? Before you say goodbye, there are a few things you should know.

1. Unhappiness isn't Forever

One of the biggest reasons couples get divorced is that they feel bored, that their marriage has become stagnant and unhappy. If this where your relationship is, ask yourself if you honestly think you'll be unhappy forever, or if there is a chance your relationship is simply stuck in a rut. Sometimes switching things up is enough to get your relationship moving forward again. Consider taking a vacation, starting a new hobby together, or trying something new in the bedroom.

2. Change Starts With You

The only person you can change is you. If you're having relationship problems related to your own behavior, understand that getting a divorce in NJ means you'll not solve the problem. If you're struggling with a specific issue, such as unfaithfulness or a distrustful attitude, you may find that these character flaws follow you into new relationships. Instead of giving up on your marriage, ask yourself if there's anything you can change about yourself to improve your marriage.

3. Sometimes Things can be Salvaged

Not all relationships can be salvaged, but many can. If you're suddenly thinking about getting a divorce in NJ because your kids have left home and you can no longer relate to your spouse, or your partner returned from a lengthy deployment and you're struggling to get along, there is hope. Consider attending marital counseling or going to a marriage conference together. While this will require a financial investment, saving your marriage will be well worth the cost. Besides, divorce isn't cheap!

Remember, whether or not you choose to get a divorce, you should consider all of your options before you head to your lawyer's office. While not all marriages can be saved, many can, so it's important to make sure you've exhausted all your options before you finally decide to end your relationship.

Most importantly, always talk with your partner about how you're feeling. If you are bored, frustrated, or lonely, chances are that your spouse is feeling the same way. Why not talk about your problems before resorting to something as permanent as divorce? You never know: it could be just the motivation you both need to start working on your relationship again.

Peter Van Aulen has been practicing law for over twenty-four (24) years. He is certified by the New Jersey Supreme Court as a matrimonial attorney. This is a distinction given to a small number of attorneys in the State of New Jersey. If you have any questions about divorce in New Jersey and want to increase your understanding of your rights, call the Law Offices of Peter Van Aulen at 201-845-7400 for a consultation.

Client Reviews
Peter has integrity, and values his relationships with his clients beyond his financial relationship with them. For me to say this about any lawyer is really saying something. He is compassionate, straightforward and knowledgeable. I would easily recommend him to anybody. Lewie W.
Peter Van Aulen handled my case with great diligence and integrity. He is also a compassionate individual who realizes what a difficult time divorce can be emotionally. Peter works hard and doesn't take any shortcuts in preparing for a case… I highly recommend Mr. Van Aulen and his staff. Chuck Solomon
Peter is an exceptionally great attorney. He handled my child custody case and was able to ease any of my concerns with honest answers. He always took the time to explain the pros/cons and was always available to answer any questions that I had… I would highly recommend this attorney to anyone who is looking for one. Jessica Cruz
Peter Van Aulen is a very compassionate, honest and straightforward person. He was there for me at my lowest point with a genuine concern not only for my situation, but for me and my child's well being above all… He is fair and he is strong and when push comes to shove he is there for you. Cathy Dodge
Our cousin used Peter's law office to help with a sticky custody situation. He was extremely responsive, very nice and most importantly did an awesome job with the court! He is awesome. Lawrence Polsky

*Results may vary depending on your particular facts and legal circumstances